Christmas 2012
Today my husband and I are alone for Christmas for the first time since 1981. My daughter was nine months old that year.
I have been lucky through the years to have been blessed with extra children as well as mine at Christmas. Now they are all getting to be near to 30 and have their own lives and plans this year. The pressure is off and the Bob and I are having a wonderful time just chilling out and enjoying the memories.
When the children were younger I remember frantic days between Thanksgiving and Christmas. There were school parties and programs. There were Sunday School pageants and midnight mass. I remember Christmas Eves' that were full; delivering gifts to friends and family, clam chowder dinner at my mother's house, followed by the kids Christmas Pageant at Church, followed by home for cocoa and the movie The Christmas Carol, followed by midnight mass at 11 PM. Busy and happy as I remember.
I remember later years drinking wine and cooking for Christmas. I remember laughter and fun. I remember the Christmas Movies; Scrooged, Christmas Story, It's a Wonderful Life. The lights off, the glow of the Christmas tree and candles, and the glitter of presents is not only a memory but a physical sensation even now.
I do not remember a bad Christmas. I don't remember fighting, crying, arguing on Christmas day. There was the annual cursing of the tree, and arguments about ornaments in the days before Christmas and probably other disturbances but the discordance is vague and unimportant.
A am an atheist now and I still enjoy Christmas. I like the day off, I like the food, I like the pie, I like the gifts and I like the music. I really like the music only in the three days before Christmas but I like it.
And so we are alone and I like that too. The Bob and I have been in love for nearly 40 years and it is nice to be together alone. Doing our own thing.
Happy Holidays, Merry Christmas
Monday, December 24, 2012
Saturday, June 16, 2012
40 Year Reunion
I got a letter the other day and it was notifying me of my 40th High School Reunion. The event on Friday is a "Meet and Greet" with appetizers and an open bar (means you pay for your own booze) and an Open Mic for Singing. It costs nearly $50 for two.
There is also a big buffet dinner on Saturday night with another open bar and dancing for about $80 for the reunion attendee and a partner. Followed the next day by Golf. Oh boy.
I thought about this for a few moments and let the nostalgia bloom a bit and then regained my senses. The best day of High School was the day I graduated and far from being the best days of my life, I would hope that I have not had all the best days yet.
First of all I don't think anyone from high school knows me or cares about me or what I have done with my life and I feel the same. No rancor. Just not interested.
There were over 400 people in my graduating class. There was no way of knowing all of them and no one really tried. From Kindergarten to 6th grade we were all in various Elementary schools. From 7th to 9th grad we were divide in to two Jr. Highs and then all funneled into the one big High School.
The people I knew best were the kids I went to Elementary school with for 6 years. And in the first month of 7th grade I was somehow deemed uncool then teased and bullied and (thankfully) ignored until graduation. So I don't have a great fondness for most of the people I went to school with.
What I remember from my high school years has nothing to do with high school. I remember doing a play or three as a tech and an incidental characters. I remember good times with the few friends I had outside of school. I remember making out with a few boys who's names I don't remember (And thank you guys. I really did enjoy it).
Most of the good times I remember from those years are with my family. We really did have fun and great discussions. I actually liked my parents and my brothers.
High School itself, meh. I liked the bit of learning I got but not much else.
It surprises me , as most of my classmates and I tried very hard to get out of high school and away from everyone there, anybody would want to back and feel like they were in high school again.
So do I spend about a $120 dollars on a beautiful August weekend being nostalgic about my graduation from a place that (in the long term) was really unimportant to my life. Or do I relax, play with a grandchild, read a book, take a nap? The latter of course.
There is also a big buffet dinner on Saturday night with another open bar and dancing for about $80 for the reunion attendee and a partner. Followed the next day by Golf. Oh boy.
I thought about this for a few moments and let the nostalgia bloom a bit and then regained my senses. The best day of High School was the day I graduated and far from being the best days of my life, I would hope that I have not had all the best days yet.
First of all I don't think anyone from high school knows me or cares about me or what I have done with my life and I feel the same. No rancor. Just not interested.
There were over 400 people in my graduating class. There was no way of knowing all of them and no one really tried. From Kindergarten to 6th grade we were all in various Elementary schools. From 7th to 9th grad we were divide in to two Jr. Highs and then all funneled into the one big High School.
The people I knew best were the kids I went to Elementary school with for 6 years. And in the first month of 7th grade I was somehow deemed uncool then teased and bullied and (thankfully) ignored until graduation. So I don't have a great fondness for most of the people I went to school with.
What I remember from my high school years has nothing to do with high school. I remember doing a play or three as a tech and an incidental characters. I remember good times with the few friends I had outside of school. I remember making out with a few boys who's names I don't remember (And thank you guys. I really did enjoy it).
Most of the good times I remember from those years are with my family. We really did have fun and great discussions. I actually liked my parents and my brothers.
High School itself, meh. I liked the bit of learning I got but not much else.
It surprises me , as most of my classmates and I tried very hard to get out of high school and away from everyone there, anybody would want to back and feel like they were in high school again.
So do I spend about a $120 dollars on a beautiful August weekend being nostalgic about my graduation from a place that (in the long term) was really unimportant to my life. Or do I relax, play with a grandchild, read a book, take a nap? The latter of course.
Monday, January 2, 2012
Musings on the Day and Stephen King
I wanted to say I was lazy and lethargic today. I do go back to work tomorrow and I have an evening meeting after work (social).
I fixed a nice dinner and even got creative with the mushrooms. I did do some shopping and did a couple of chores around the house. So not really lazy and lethargic.
It was cold today. It was 25 degrees when I got up at 930 this morning and warmed up to nearly 30 and at one point at about 330 the sun came out a bit. And now it has started snowing a bit. Might make for a fun commute tomorrow.
I have been reading a lot lately. Just recently I have read Stephen King's 11/22/63 and am now reading It again. They don't tie together really but reading the first made me want to go to the next one. I do like Stephen King's writing. I cannot say I always enjoy it but it is thought provoking. I think the older I get the more I like what he writes. We are close to the same age and I really understand what he is saying about the era that shaped our growing up, the society that got us from there to here and the nostalgia that hides the realities of our past.
We make up horrors to help us cope with the real ones.
Stephen King
I fixed a nice dinner and even got creative with the mushrooms. I did do some shopping and did a couple of chores around the house. So not really lazy and lethargic.
It was cold today. It was 25 degrees when I got up at 930 this morning and warmed up to nearly 30 and at one point at about 330 the sun came out a bit. And now it has started snowing a bit. Might make for a fun commute tomorrow.
I have been reading a lot lately. Just recently I have read Stephen King's 11/22/63 and am now reading It again. They don't tie together really but reading the first made me want to go to the next one. I do like Stephen King's writing. I cannot say I always enjoy it but it is thought provoking. I think the older I get the more I like what he writes. We are close to the same age and I really understand what he is saying about the era that shaped our growing up, the society that got us from there to here and the nostalgia that hides the realities of our past.
We make up horrors to help us cope with the real ones.
Stephen King
Sunday, January 1, 2012
Ah 2012. And this is just me riding on the Crazy Train that is my life. I am going to try this year to post regularly. I don't know what that will look like yet. It is not a resolution, more like a guideline and if anyone is interested they are welcome to come on board.
I have decided to avoid being too topical or ranty or preachy, although that may happen sometimes when I just cannot help myself.
So I find myself the first day of 2012 recovering from the last of 2011. Not due to having a wild night. I had a migraine yesterday. For those of you who have never experienced a migraine, thank whatever deity you believe in and be grateful for never having the experience if you do not have a deity.
Red hot poker in the left temple with pain radiating into my left arm and shoulder from extremely tense muscles. Lightening flashes in the left eye that cause even more pain. Add to this a tummy that will not keep anything down due to this pain and you have a truly BAD DAY. This description does not due it justice. Those who have experienced this fine form of torture know exactly what I am saying. Those who have not are probably dismissing me as a wuss.
4 hours at the emergency room with an I.V of various things and I could cope with going home: where I passed out and woke about 9 PM. The rest of New Year's Eve was spent sipping tea and reading quietly and being grateful to being able to do that. Woot! for the New Year as I felt better today. No pain at least.
I was able to go shopping and get the ingredients for my Vegetarian Bean Soup which is a great start for the New Year. I was going to make Corn Muffins to go with it but apparently in a fit of cleaning, I threw my old rusty muffin pans away so we had whole grain toast.
It started snowing at just after midnight and we had about an inch on the ground this morning. It warmed up to about 37 degrees by 2 PM but now the temp has plunged to 28. And the wind is suppose to come up. I think it will be a very cold night.
Tomorrow is another day off before the work of 2012 actually begins. I want to exercise more this year, sleep a bit more this year and writing a bit more this year if anyone actually reads it or not.
Happy 2012. I hope it was good for you.
New Year's Day: Now is the accepted time to make your regular annual good resolutions. Next week you can begin paving hell with them as usual. ~Mark Twain
I have decided to avoid being too topical or ranty or preachy, although that may happen sometimes when I just cannot help myself.
So I find myself the first day of 2012 recovering from the last of 2011. Not due to having a wild night. I had a migraine yesterday. For those of you who have never experienced a migraine, thank whatever deity you believe in and be grateful for never having the experience if you do not have a deity.
Red hot poker in the left temple with pain radiating into my left arm and shoulder from extremely tense muscles. Lightening flashes in the left eye that cause even more pain. Add to this a tummy that will not keep anything down due to this pain and you have a truly BAD DAY. This description does not due it justice. Those who have experienced this fine form of torture know exactly what I am saying. Those who have not are probably dismissing me as a wuss.
4 hours at the emergency room with an I.V of various things and I could cope with going home: where I passed out and woke about 9 PM. The rest of New Year's Eve was spent sipping tea and reading quietly and being grateful to being able to do that. Woot! for the New Year as I felt better today. No pain at least.
I was able to go shopping and get the ingredients for my Vegetarian Bean Soup which is a great start for the New Year. I was going to make Corn Muffins to go with it but apparently in a fit of cleaning, I threw my old rusty muffin pans away so we had whole grain toast.
It started snowing at just after midnight and we had about an inch on the ground this morning. It warmed up to about 37 degrees by 2 PM but now the temp has plunged to 28. And the wind is suppose to come up. I think it will be a very cold night.
Tomorrow is another day off before the work of 2012 actually begins. I want to exercise more this year, sleep a bit more this year and writing a bit more this year if anyone actually reads it or not.
Happy 2012. I hope it was good for you.
New Year's Day: Now is the accepted time to make your regular annual good resolutions. Next week you can begin paving hell with them as usual. ~Mark Twain
Thursday, October 20, 2011
Thoughts for the week.
Occupy Wall Street and the World.
I agree with the Occupy Wall Street people as far as I can understand them and I am one of the 99%.
I think the Occupy movement is an emotional response to what is thought to be an unfair and unworkable set of circumstance.
I think a mistake was made with all that stimulus money
My idea for the stimulus, the TARP funds, was to give all the trillions to the American people.
If the 'powers that be' and the politicians had given everyone over 18 a share of that 3 Trillion (or however much it was) we all would have had a nice chunk of change. Yes, there would be people who used it foolishly. So what. The money would be back in the economy.
Most people would pay off credit cards, or mortgage, or put a down payment on a new house or car. Some might have bought goods and services. Or put it in stocks and bonds. The money would be out there helping the real economy; helping people pay their medical bills, helping them pay student loans.
Instead the money is making rich people richer.
I have thought of going to a big Occupy event in someplace like Seattle. What keeps me home is what has always kept me home from big rallies and protests: I have to pee a lot when nervous and crowds make me nervous. Even on my best days at sporting events, parades and other big social events I have to know where to find the nears clean bathroom.
If I got arrested, I wouldn't mind except for what if I had to pee? Would an irritated cop understand my need to go every 15 minutes? Getting arrested must be stressful, I am sure so I would be nervous. I can see me confessing to anything, just so I could go to the bathroom.
"Yes, officer I did call you a 'big poo head' and I intimated that your sexual organ was tiny. I agree that is a gross misdemeanor as well as slander and perjury and whatever else you say. Please let me go pee now!"
As for the politics, I really don't know where the Occupy people are on that and I don't really care. I just want them to vote.
I can't vote for a Republican because right now they all seem to believe and say stuff with which I cannot agree. Any of it. And I do listen and I do try, but people of the Republican mindset just don't think my concerns are theirs. This wasn't always true. I was able to vote for Republicans in the past.
This week has gone better than last week and tomorrow is Friday. The week will be over and the weekend all too short. I don't get satisfaction from my work anymore, I just get through it.
I agree with the Occupy Wall Street people as far as I can understand them and I am one of the 99%.
I think the Occupy movement is an emotional response to what is thought to be an unfair and unworkable set of circumstance.
I think a mistake was made with all that stimulus money
My idea for the stimulus, the TARP funds, was to give all the trillions to the American people.
If the 'powers that be' and the politicians had given everyone over 18 a share of that 3 Trillion (or however much it was) we all would have had a nice chunk of change. Yes, there would be people who used it foolishly. So what. The money would be back in the economy.
Most people would pay off credit cards, or mortgage, or put a down payment on a new house or car. Some might have bought goods and services. Or put it in stocks and bonds. The money would be out there helping the real economy; helping people pay their medical bills, helping them pay student loans.
Instead the money is making rich people richer.
I have thought of going to a big Occupy event in someplace like Seattle. What keeps me home is what has always kept me home from big rallies and protests: I have to pee a lot when nervous and crowds make me nervous. Even on my best days at sporting events, parades and other big social events I have to know where to find the nears clean bathroom.
If I got arrested, I wouldn't mind except for what if I had to pee? Would an irritated cop understand my need to go every 15 minutes? Getting arrested must be stressful, I am sure so I would be nervous. I can see me confessing to anything, just so I could go to the bathroom.
"Yes, officer I did call you a 'big poo head' and I intimated that your sexual organ was tiny. I agree that is a gross misdemeanor as well as slander and perjury and whatever else you say. Please let me go pee now!"
As for the politics, I really don't know where the Occupy people are on that and I don't really care. I just want them to vote.
I can't vote for a Republican because right now they all seem to believe and say stuff with which I cannot agree. Any of it. And I do listen and I do try, but people of the Republican mindset just don't think my concerns are theirs. This wasn't always true. I was able to vote for Republicans in the past.
This week has gone better than last week and tomorrow is Friday. The week will be over and the weekend all too short. I don't get satisfaction from my work anymore, I just get through it.
Sunday, September 18, 2011
Last night's post was a bit incoherent as it was nearly 3 AM.
I think it would be a good idea to let anyone interested what I think a bit and what my politics and life view are.
1. I am a Democrat. I have voted for selected Republicans in my time when the Democrat was too crazy to vote for. I wish some Republicans would do the same. I think having fairly sane, mostly middle of the road politicians is probably a good thing for both sides and the community.
2. I will not vote for any candidate that is against women's rights, reproductive rights, gay rights, racial equality, and taking care of the poor, elderly and those who cannot or will not care for themselves. As Jesus said "what you do for the least of these my brothers you do unto me." I am not a Christian but I 'get' it. I wish more so called Christians did. A reason I cannot vote for Republicans.
3. I believe that every child born should be given adequate food, medical care, and all they need to succeed in school. I don't care who their parents are or where they come from. I believe raising a generation that has the tools to succeed will grow our economy in a positive way. Taxes are the way to do this. My grand-parents and great-grand parents paid their taxes for my schools, roads, infrastructure, clean air and water. I believe I owe the same to future generations. A reason I cannot vote for Republican's
4. I don't believe that anyone's religion should be the guiding principle of this nation. I am a Skeptic not an atheist really. I can see how religion comforts some, but it should not rule. A reason I cannot vote for Republicans.
I see fear in the people I talk to that things are changing to fast so they cling to old, outmoded ideas and ideals. The time has come for us to embrace and new world with new ideas and find that it will be better for all, but too many people are afraid of losing...What? I don't really understand. I wouldn't go back to the not so good olden days.
I remember them way too well to think that there ever was a Golden Age when taxes were low and everyone knew there place.
So that is my Crazy Train Philosophy/Politics. Take it or leave it.
I think it would be a good idea to let anyone interested what I think a bit and what my politics and life view are.
1. I am a Democrat. I have voted for selected Republicans in my time when the Democrat was too crazy to vote for. I wish some Republicans would do the same. I think having fairly sane, mostly middle of the road politicians is probably a good thing for both sides and the community.
2. I will not vote for any candidate that is against women's rights, reproductive rights, gay rights, racial equality, and taking care of the poor, elderly and those who cannot or will not care for themselves. As Jesus said "what you do for the least of these my brothers you do unto me." I am not a Christian but I 'get' it. I wish more so called Christians did. A reason I cannot vote for Republicans.
3. I believe that every child born should be given adequate food, medical care, and all they need to succeed in school. I don't care who their parents are or where they come from. I believe raising a generation that has the tools to succeed will grow our economy in a positive way. Taxes are the way to do this. My grand-parents and great-grand parents paid their taxes for my schools, roads, infrastructure, clean air and water. I believe I owe the same to future generations. A reason I cannot vote for Republican's
4. I don't believe that anyone's religion should be the guiding principle of this nation. I am a Skeptic not an atheist really. I can see how religion comforts some, but it should not rule. A reason I cannot vote for Republicans.
I see fear in the people I talk to that things are changing to fast so they cling to old, outmoded ideas and ideals. The time has come for us to embrace and new world with new ideas and find that it will be better for all, but too many people are afraid of losing...What? I don't really understand. I wouldn't go back to the not so good olden days.
I remember them way too well to think that there ever was a Golden Age when taxes were low and everyone knew there place.
So that is my Crazy Train Philosophy/Politics. Take it or leave it.
Crazy returns
Sometimes riding the crazy train means you don't have time to post. I have just come through about 6 months of depression. Various stresses various crap and I am now just getting level. I have a cat wanting to knead my leg right now so I am getting irritated. The claws digging in do not mean affection from my end.
I am sick and in pain and yet so much better mentally than I have been for a while. Fall is coming and that is my favorite time of the year. I am taking my vitamin D and find I am one of those people that really naturally prefer the dark days to the light. I always felt bad about that; as if I were some sort of idiot slacker. I do love the dawn but from the 'end of the night' side rather than the when you first 'wake up' side.
Oh, dear headaches coming round again and it is 3 in the morning. Got to go. Back soon.
I am sick and in pain and yet so much better mentally than I have been for a while. Fall is coming and that is my favorite time of the year. I am taking my vitamin D and find I am one of those people that really naturally prefer the dark days to the light. I always felt bad about that; as if I were some sort of idiot slacker. I do love the dawn but from the 'end of the night' side rather than the when you first 'wake up' side.
Oh, dear headaches coming round again and it is 3 in the morning. Got to go. Back soon.
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